New World: No Giving up

2nd semester is just nearly 6 days to go. This means a new set of schedules, rooms, teachers, and classmates, yet with the same goal and motivation. 

Back in the days where my feet sore for all those tiring tracking of my rooms, where I couldn't just help it but to have a map or some tracking device. My school is huge. Talk about a 24-hectare university where you wish for a mean of transportation across the buildings. Back in the days where I met some annoying, arrogant, and lazy teachers; which is not good, and you were like checking the minutes left from time to time during classes. Back in the days where I have to make new friends and blend in. It was really hard to mingle with the new faces because each has his own field of interest, their nature is different from where I got used to. 

Indeed, everything was strange. Everything was different from high school. I thought it was gonna be easy, but it took me a while to adjust. 

The first day of school was the day that marked the end of my high school life. It was the day that I really felt that I am no longer a senior anymore, weird because I didn't feel that on our graduation day and the following days after. It was the day where I finally went back to my senses and realized I'm in a whole new world now. 

As I was adjusting and exploring, I felt loneliness, sadness, and boredom. It was as if every minute I want to meet with my friends 'coz I miss them so badly! Well, I know, they're all part of the drama. I know, I'll get by and I did. With the help of my closest friends, all the sickness went away. Every time we see each other, I realize I was never alone. However, I know that I shouldn't rely on them which made me befriend my classmates and get to know them more. They are not bad after all, nor neither good as what I expected. The thing is, I can go well with them, with their interests, and views. I'm happy 'coz I was never out of place.  Yet still, you can't refuse to choose the people you wanna spend your time with at school and you can't refuse to not like them all. 

Sometimes, I wonder if this is the place I should be. 

But if not here, where?

One morning, as I was making it to my first class, some questions just popped out inside my head, and I wonder if I could ever make it, not to my first class, but to my graduation day #futuristic. I wonder if I could get a degree on BS Accountancy on time. I wonder if I could make it to the cut-offs and pass all the qualifying exams each year. I wonder if I'm still gonna be a regular accountancy student four years later. AND I wonder if I can handle everything with all the unsettled issues back home. 

Accounting was very new to me. It was a whole new word added to my vocabulary. I had lots of disappointments at school and my major subject was one of them. I'm disappointed because it seems that the whole system was unfair. I don't know but I felt that there's no more second chances at all. It was do or die. Oh well, I can't do anything about it, I just have to face it. Instead of whining, I took it as a challenge. I didn't stop even there's nothing option left but to give up, yet I didn't. I said to myself, "This is what I've chosen, I have nothing to do but to go with it." Every time I think of these stuffs, I ask God if what he thinks, I ask him, too if this is also His plan for me. Unfortunately, I still don't have the answers, but somehow God gave me a sign. A sign that is meaningful to me. A sign that says, you're just getting started, you still have a long way to go. Fortunately, I made it to the first cut, and this was the sign I'm referring to. 

I know I can make it. I can make it because I believe. I believe because I have to. I have to because if not, no one will. 

This 2nd semester, I have to exert more effort and more focus on my second accounting subject. There's no more turning back. I can make it. I can make it. I will. I will. So if you think you're that bitch who doesn't believe in me, think again, karma might just hunt you!